Idols West Africa winner, Timi Dakolo in an exclusive chat with The Entertainer at the Congress Hall of Nicon Hilton Hotel, Abuja, recently, opened on marriage and fatherhood. Timi, who tied the knot in 2012 to his baby mama, Busola, declared that marriage has transformed him.
“Marriage has really transformed me,” Dakolo begins, a soft smile playing across his lips as he speaks, “life is not just what it used to be any more I must confess. I can’t do a lot of things I want to do anymore because now I am married and it has made me more responsible. These days I think for more than just one person. Marriage makes you start every journey with an end in mind and that is the joy of being married.
“Even as I speak to you I am thinking of how I will pay school fees and house rent. A lot of responsibility comes with marriage but then, it also comes with a lot of favour; undeserved favour, favour you can’t even explain being showered upon you from left right and centre.
“When you are married and your home is stable, it comes with a lot of blessings you can’t explain. People treat you differently, even God Himself brings things your way and you begin to see the world differently because things just click,” he says, snapping his fingers to drive home his point adding, “you can’t even explain why and you don’t know how it happens; that is the truth. Especially if you are at peace in your home, things just begin to click.”
“Before I got married I prayed to God for a woman who would understand me and my moods because I could be very easily distracted and destabilised so I wanted a woman that would not give me trouble but rather, complement me.
“The truth is when I am troubled and distressed I could be the least creative person for as much as four days at a stretch so because I wanted peace in my home, because I wanted somebody that would understand when I tell her that ‘baby, you can’t talk to me now I am writing,’ and she wouldn’t get upset, I had to pray a lot and I thank God I found that person in my wife.
“Now you could tell that to some people and they would get very angry and upset with you but my wife does not because she understands and sometimes, when I am busy and the kids are getting in the way she tells them ‘don’t go there, daddy wants to be alone.’
“She understands my moods. That is how we are. She is my greatest critique. A man’s greatest achievement is marriage. Marriage has transformed even my music.”
Timi dedicated a song to her on his latest album entitled ‘Iyawo Mi’.
“Yes of course, Iyawo Mi is a song on my soon to be released album,” Dakolo says excitedly. “The single was released a while ago and it is dedicated to my wife. I can’t be singing R&B and not dedicate a song to my wife; it is not possible.”
So now that he is married, are the girls still coming after him?
He pauses for a while before he responds philosophically quoting a Bible passage: “The Bible says ‘many are the afflictions of the righteous man.’ What I do is that I stay out of trouble and the way I avoid temptation is by sitting in my house and watching football, playing video games and doing music, and I am always so happy at the end of the day.
“I always try to push my wife in people’s faces whenever I have the opportunity because when it comes to temptation, no man is as strong as he thinks he is and that is the truth. So if you want to avoid temptation, just sit in your house and don’t forget that our industry is a very unforgiving one; I don’t want scandals.”
Idols West Africa
“I had big dreams but music was not part of it,” Dakolo recounts, “I stumbled on music basically. Sometimes you stumble on destiny on the road you are taking to avoid it. It began with somebody telling me to go for West African Idols. It was after West African Idols that I now said ‘okay, music is something I just might do’ because in my house those days, you can’t say you want to do music unless you are out of your mind! They will tell you to first return all the fees they paid to get you through school,” he says laughing.
Love & Consequences
With three successful albums in the kitty, Timi says work is currently ongoing on his next body of work. Commenting on his new album Timi continues: “I am recording a new album entitled Love & Consequences. It is a 14 tracker. I have been in Georgia, Atlanta, recording live with Cohbams because I want my music to have that unique live feel.
“Love & Consequences is almost ready. The message is that there are consequences for getting married whether negative or positive. I have a song that is entitled Iyawo Mi which was released a while ago and dedicated to Busola my wife: the video is currently trending on YouTube. I have Wish Me Well, there is The Vow and there is also Stranded. My Great Nation song is also on this album.
“And guess what; I have also started working on the album after this one entitled Ateni’s Grandson which is dedicated to my late grand mum, the woman who raised me.
“Ateni’s Grandson is basically about the things she told me about life and a few songs from here and there. There is another album I am also working on entitled The Rock Side of Things. Like I said earlier, marriage will make you start a journey with an end in mind.”
No more kids please…
And just three years after he tied the knot, Timi reveals that he now has three kids and he is through with making babies: “I have three kids now and I can confidently tell you that my wife and I are done making children; no more kids because I have three already. I am done with making babies.”
Three kids in four years, how did he pull it off?
“My name is Timi Dakolo and I get away with a lot of things,” he concludes.