Nollywood actress, Mercy Aigbe has come out to write on marriage.
In her opinion, marriage is overrated and should never be seen as an achievement.
According to the movie star, mothers actually raise their daughters to accept anything their partner does to them all in the name of staying married, and this is totally wrong.
She added that religion is also not helping, because when a woman goes to report to tell her pastor about her marital difficulties, he only asks her to keep praying.
Her words, “Our mothers brought us up, as women, to take whatever our partners do to us. They tell us to take it because we want to remain in a man’s house. To me, it is not an achievement. Let’s just say as it is– marriage is overrated. It takes two people to make it work; it’s not just about the women. However,, everybody keeps heaping all the responsibilities on the woman. That shouldn’t be.”
“The first time the slap came, it felt like I was dreaming. I wasn’t expecting it and I was shocked beyond words. I didn’t know it was going to happen however, it happened. The begging would then come after that. Once a man raises his hand to hit you, he is going to do it over and again. However, because it was my second attempt (at marriage), I was ready to make it work, even with all the violence. I was there hoping and praying. I just wanted a happy home.”
“The incident that broke the camel’s back was the one where I nearly died. The beating was horrible. People often say actresses don’t want to remain married. Who told them that? (You think) being a celebrity doesn’t make me human? Does (being a celebrity) mean I don’t want to have a happy home? They say actresses are promiscuous however, promiscuity is not (the exclusive preserve of) any profession. When mine (break-up) happened, it wasn’t easy because I'm a celebrity. I read tons of things online. Some people even said I made it up. However,, nobody can dictate to me how to live my life.”
“I've been through domestic violence and I came out strong. I would love to see the end of domestic violence in society. It wasn’t easy for me because society always shames one. Everybody believes if one is experiencing domestic violence, one has to be patient as a woman and take it all to remain in one’s husband’s house. A lot of people have lost their lives as a result of domestic violence. And religion is not helping. An assaulted woman could go to her pastor and the cleric would say, ‘Oh madam, you need to keep praying’. Is it until she loses her life?”