With one more week of European football in the bag, it's time for another edition of 90min's *Tim Westwood style air-horns* DEFINITIVE. EUROPEAN. POWER. RANKINGS.
Here they are:
15. Fiorentina (New)
Yes they've only played one game, but what a game it was. La Viola were as electric as they were ruthless in the 6-1 demolition of ChievoVerona at the Stadio Artemi Franchi.
You're right, that is the same Chievo that blunted Cristiano Ronaldo in Juventus' opener, and so nearly upset the apple cart against their domineering counterparts from Turin.
A sincerely impressive introductory bow from the Florentines, in yet another sincerely impressive kit. They just relentlessly churn out quality shirts, don't they?
14. Roma (Down 2)
It's not the best third goal Kostas Manolas has scored in a game for Roma, and definitely not the most important, but the defender's 82nd minute leveller did show an inordinate amount of dexterity for a centre back.
It was a cultured finish from the "Greek God in Rome" and saved his side's blushes after an entertainingly frenetic thriller with Atalanta.
13. Ajax (New)
Few teams have had a better week than the 33 time Dutch champions. It started on Saturday with a 5-0 trouncing of Eredivisie new boys FC Emmen, with Hakim Ziyech, Klaas-Jan Huntelaar and Dusan Tadic all getting in on the goals.
And then, on Tuesday night, the Amsterdam giants made their long anticipated return to the Champions League after a four-year hiatus, coming through a tricky tie with Zenit St Petersburg 3-1 on aggregate.
Welcome back to the big time, de Godenzonen.
12. Borussia Dortmund (re-entry)
It's hard to find fault in Borussia Dortmund's start to the Bundesliga. With one game played, BVB are sitting pretty at the top of the table, following their 4-1 humbling of 'best of the rest' rivals RB Leipzig.
Indeed, they were even able to remove all the cobwebs from last season's disastrous start by immediately showing their newfound mettle under Lucien Favre - bouncing back from a goal down inside the first minute.
11. Chelsea (Down 2)
Maurizio Sarri's Chelsea rumble on. Three wins from three, the Blues are slowly ingratiating themselves into the ways of the 59-year-old.
Newcastle provided a different challenge, and though much of their attack was stilted and narrow in the first half, they showed their resolve in the second, displaying much more width - and it ultimately paid off.
Promisingly, but not surprisingly, that man up there continues to dazzle onlookers with his conducting abilities - and N'golo Kante did a flick, so all in all, good work!
10. Napoli
The aforementioned coach's replacement has arguably got off to a better start at his old hunting ground. Carlo Ancelotti's tenure at Napoli has kicked off with two wins against significant opposition in Lazio and Milan, both of them coming from resilient comebacks.
Though he will surely be worried by their slow starts in both, on the face of it that doesn't matter if you can finish as strongly as they have done, especially in their 27 minute second half turnaround of the Rossoneri's two goal lead.
9. Liverpool (Down 2)
The Reds march on.
Another week, another win, another Mohamed Salah goal. The newly crowned Premier League gameweek three champions have started the season as they mean to go on, surely, and the emergence of Virgil van Dijk as a reliable fulcrum has clearly solidified their base.
Having said that, Brighton weren't completely out of this game, and with better finishing could definitely have snuck a point at Anfield. Food for thought for Jurgen Klopp's victory parade department.
8. Paris Saint-Germain
Speaking of title parades, PSG have seemingly started theirs a bit early this year - in August, to be precise, and after a 3-1 victory over Angers, no less.
To be fair, you can't really admonish them with any true conviction - they are as clear a title winner as you can get - but even so, celebrating such a formulaic victory in this fashion is unequivocally tinpot, or as they say in France, pot d'étain.
7. Bayern Munich (Down 2)
Bayern kicked off the 2018/19 season in the only way they know - winning. Even so, the perennial German champions' inaugural victory was not quite as comfortable as the 3-1 scoreline suggests.
They were pedestrian at times, and this wasn't at all helped by Kingsley Coman's enforced exit just before time, with an ankle injury that looks set to sideline him for a considerable period.
Consequentially, the necessary load may be too be cumbersome for veterans Arjen Robben and Frank Ribery to handle on the wings.
6. Tottenham (Up 5)
The biggest result of the weekend grants this week's biggest rise up the rankings.
Spurs came to Old Trafford with the smell of Jose Mourinho's blood ingrained in their nostrils, and after an initial adjustment to his unexpected pressing tactics, emphatically claimed all three points.
However, even though I already said this in week one, you get the feeling this might be as good as it gets for Tottenham.
Then again, sixth place in the DEFINITIVE EUROPEAN POWER RANKINGS is fairly prestigious, so fair play.
5. Manchester City (Down 2)
In the end, it was two dropped points for Pep Guardiola's men, and though Wolves were good value for their point, City will definitely see it as an opportunity missed.
His side's general sloppiness will naturally be a concern, and Kevin De Bruyne's absence may prove more influential than initially thought, but nevertheless this game feels much more like an anomaly than a potential turning point.
In some way, being knocked down a peg or two may be just what this self-aggrandised team needs.
4. Barcelona
On an absolutely horrific, barely-fit-for-sunday-league pitch, the 2017/18 La Liga champions managed to remain unbeaten, and also impenetrable, but [theme emerging, narrative unfolding] it could've been very different, had Real Vallodolid's goal not been (correctly) disallowed by VAR.
And yet, the champions did what champions do, and amidst a divot epidemic, were able to keep their heads to go back to the glossy Nou Camp with all three points.
3. Atletico Madrid (Down 1)
Perhaps this position is a hangover from their Super Cup triumph, but on Saturday Atletico did what Atletico do best, and that's grind out a 1-0 victory.
Admittedly this one was against a newly promoted Rayo Vallecano side, so maybe we should've expected more ambition from such bonafide title challengers, but Diego Simeone won't mind a jot, as long as the opposition continue to be on the receiving end of a flaunted L.
2. Real Madrid (Up 3)
Top of the table once more, it was hugs all round for BBA.
Sure, it was a tough first half, and they were a goal down for the first 39 minutes, but with the help of two ridiculous penalties, Los Blancos were able to loosen their shackles and play some truly wonderful football.
One man in particular looked especially emboldened following this liberation, and that was Gareth Bale. Cristiano who?
1. Juventus
Ronaldo. It's Cristiano Ro-nal-do, and he's once again resting resplendently atop the power rankings table, even if he remains - as Richard Keys so eloquently pointed out - goalless from his first two outings in a Juve shirt.
Amazingly, he could even be see smiling (see above), albeit a bit unnaturally, at the goalscoring exploits of another player for at least one of the two goals scored by the Bianconeri against Lazio.
Now that is progress. Frightening progress.